D for Dress

The Body Series

Hello Wild Ones 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

I hope you are well and doing great. I hope that you are taking care of yourself. You are amazing and awesome. I am currently full of hope and grace. 🌻🌻

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Body Series

This series hopes to explore issues that women face when it comes to insecurities about their bodies and societal pressures. (I was going to write just my experience then I realized that that’s just one body type) I hope this style makes sense to y’all. Feel free to go back and read other articles for this series.


Alien, when I was younger, I wore the tiniest of clothes, and no one said anything. I was cute; there was no doubt about it. Then I had protrudings on my chest, and suddenly the whole world cared about what I wore; in fact, I was encouraged to cover up because I was tempting men. The most confusing time is when I wore a petticoat under my school dress, and at some point, it became bigger than my cloth because my mum tended to buy oversize things since I was growing too fast. I remember this teacher approaching me and asking me to pull my petticoat up because I was trying to seduce men. Imagine how weirded out 12-year-old me was after being told that simple cloth was supposedly seducing men. It was so shocking that clothes have so much power alien. Now I am not so shocked because I have watched the clothes used to decide what a person is like. It’s a norm to decide so much about a person from their clothes. Always shocks me. Where did this notion come from? Especially for us Africans who barely wore any clothes before. As if this was not crazy enough, people also tend to have the audacity to tell women what they should wear and deciding what looks good on them. Here are some women’s experiences when they wore certain articles and how they were made to feel messed up.

Knee-Length Dress

I had bought this cute dress, and I just loved the way it swayed. I felt like a princess. I felt so cute. I couldn’t stop staring at myself; I was so impressed with the way I looked. I took many pictures before I went out. I arrived at the bus station, then this tout from the bus whistled at me and declared that I had the most beautiful legs. I mumbled thank you and tried to move away from him quickly. He grabbed my hand, and he said, ‘Sister, I just want your number. I promise I will make you feel right.’ I tried to break free, and he pulled me closer and asked why I had dressed so seductively if I didn’t want his attention. I had heard stories of women being stripped because they had worn short clothes and had failed to reciprocate attention from men. I couldn’t believe that this was going to be me. Now I always have to think about where I am going and be careful about what I wear.

I just liked the way I looked

Crop Top

I was just walking down the street with my cute crop top. I was proud of how good I looked. Then he came to my face and asked why I was out here showing them my FUPA. He asked if I didn’t realize that my tummy wasn’t flat. He talked about how repulsive I looked, and I just stood there as every form of sexiness that I had embodied in myself left me. His friends stood at the corner of the street as they jeered and shouted. I felt so unattractive, and I couldn’t wait to get home to change.

I loved that crop top

Long Dress

I loved the way that long flowy dress swept the ground. I loved how I felt like a beautiful angel in it. He was sitting next to me when he winked at me, and I looked away. He kept trying to get my attention, and I did my best to avoid him. Then suddenly, I felt someone grab my flowy dress. It was him, trying to tear it off. He said, ‘Hey, you miss modesty, acting like the queen of virgins. Don’t you know that you are privileged to get my attention, especially now that you dress like a granny?’ My dress was sunny and flowy, and now all I could see granny, granny, granny.

Not even modesty could save me

Cute Bralette

I just minded my business as I wore that cute bralette. I loved its color and how it popped with my melanin. I was just up and about feeling really cute when he suddenly came up to me and demanded why I was dressed like a hoe. At first, I looked around me to make sure that he talked to me because I was not sure what he was talking about. I just loved the way I looked in that yellow bralette, and now I was a hoe

I became a hoe

Women should have the power to where what they want without being sexualized, harassed, and judged. Some women find power in modesty and others find power in showing off their bodies. The world should have a place for both kinds of women.

Here are some tips that could help those girls fall in love with themselves in a cruel world like this.

  • Compliment your body part
  • Take that body part on a date or a movie night like Jane from The Bold Type did for her boobs.
  • Follow people with your body type on social media, it always helps to see them looking really good.
  • Fall in love with yourself so no one can tell you anything about your body
  • Taking good pictures of yourself so that you can look at them on days you feel less helps a lot.
  • Remember you are sexy as hell


What cloth did you wear and get the weirdest reactions that you never expected?


Today’s Tip

Pinterest: Randi Durham


With Loooooove and Sunshine 💖🌞💖🌞, Jackie

9 Comments Add yours

  1. carolendanu says:

    I totally relate to each and every paragraph in this piece.

    1. jackie says:

      It’s sad that society has normalized this. I hope one day you will read a post like this and not relate. Here’s to a better world. Thank you for reading.

  2. James Wetu says:

    Well written Jackie. It is so courageous of you to write about this. I applaud you. More importantly, I aplaud you for the fact that you have grown beyond that and helping others who may be going a similar issue. see you at the top.

    1. jackie says:

      Thank you for the Kind words James. I see you at the top too.

  3. ashok says:

    Good to know you are still filled with hope and grace Jackie 😊🤗

    1. jackie says:

      I hope you are well too.💖💖

      1. ashok says:

        Yes Jackie – all well with His grace 💖🙏

  4. As a child i used to go with my mother to the women clothing shops, i loved the smell the fussing around and the posing in front of the mirrors. i continued the love for these pastimes with my wife’s later in life and now continue the practice with my daughter. Shopping with a woman for clothes has a certain quality of the feminin about rarely experienced in other situations.

    1. jackie says:

      Shopping for clothes is always an amazing experience. Your daughter will appreciate it.💛💛

I appreciate your opinion!!! Leave a comment!!