LOOKING AT ‘THE DEFINING DECADE BY MEG JAY’
Hello Wild Ones💝💝💝💝
I hope you are well and that great things are happening for you. My prayer is that you know how awesome you are. I am currently really proud of how awesome I am and the dope things I continue to do.
Today’s Commercial Break
I will be analyzing this book while putting some of my own story in it. I hope you learn something from it. Please check the book below. I would appreciate it if you read it and share your understanding too.Please read other blogs on the analysis of ‘The Defining Decade‘ here.
Adults don’t emerge. They’re made.Kay Hymowitz, social commentator
When I was younger, I always knew myself as the smartest girl in each room that I walked in, then I went to high school, and I wasn’t. I didn’t know who I was without my perfect grades, and Cue me spending the next four years trying to find that girl. I really struggled. I was the girl who was always studying, but no one could give a valid reason why I didn’t pass. I went through an identity crisis that lasted for a very long time. I had trouble letting go of my grades, even in university, where I spent a lot of time in the library trying to get better grades. I don’t know when I let go of this notion, but to be fair, I think I still struggle just that it is not as intensely as before.
Meg Jay in her book, The Defining Decade talks about Erik Erikson who grew up in a blended family and always felt like he didn’t really have an identity. He was the first person to coin the term ‘Identity Crisis‘ where one doesn’t really know who they are and their purpose. He would later be able to move from fatherless to a Pulitzer winner. In his years what he creates was ‘Identity Capital‘ that brought him to the point that he even decides to change his surname to Erikson which means Son of Erik.
According to Meg Jay, identity capital is a set of personal assets. It is what we bring to the adult marketplace. It can be created through doing odd jobs and volunteering or doing what you are passionate about. It is basically making sure that you always have something on your resume that people can grasp on. Your identity capital is what allows you to state how much you are worth. You don’t achieve identity capital immediately, it is gradual. You start with that odd job that leads you to the next and the next. The thing one should be careful about identity capital is to always know your worth for what it is so that you don’t oversell or undersell. You cannot graduate and expect to get a big job with a big salary but also you cannot be an intern for years without growing.
Creating your identity capital can also be learning skills or practicing your hobbies. For Example; I used to run a poetry page when I finished high school and that page led me to make connections that helped me apply for my scholarship in Rwanda. I also almost worked with a clothing brand in Kenya that has gone on to be very big (I always regret this). It is easy to console yourself that the twenties are for the mess and the crisis but too much crisis is not good. You should always have something that you are doing and it could lead you to what you want to be. Don’t sit around and wait for a pigeon to appear with a message about what you are meant to be. Go out and try photography and do it passionately then maybe you will bump into someone who will lead you to what you are meant to be. Do this always analyzing your capital and making sure that you are not selling yourself short.
I didn’t do Meg Jay’s book justice with this short analysis of the first chapter, please do buy and read the book here.
How are you currently building your identity capital?
With Loooooove and Sunshine 💖🌞💖🌞, Jackie