Hello Wild ones 🦜
I hope you are okay and keeping safe. I have been listening to a lot of sad songs and slow-dancing to music that makes me want to cry just to be in the moment of my feelings. If only I cool hibernate until it’s over but I can’t. Anyway, let’s see that poem!!!
What do you wish you spent more time doing five years ago?
I wish I have spent more time on myself and my mental health. After assessing my past five years, I have been using people and work to avoid see that I need to work on certain things in my life. The process of removing the bricks that you built around the child that was hurt by the childhood trauma is hard. Sometimes you prefer to walk around with fear of the effects of your trauma than to face it. So for the longest time, I was running away from ever having to face the pain that I went through as a child. I thought if I just overcompensated with love and was the smartest girl in class, no one would know how hard my childhood was. In fact, no one would care but girls like me, will love you more than they love themselves then expect you to fill the quarter-full glass of love that they give to themselves. I regret stopping therapy last year but I am here now and I just wish I can learn to forgive myself for neglecting myself for so long. But since I have hit rock bottom, the place I am going is upwards and that’s a good thing.
What do you wish you had done in the past five years?
With love and regret,