You are not a Nice Guy

Why You Should Do Better

Hello Wild Ones 🧡🧡🧡, (No confetti because I am sure you are not a nice guy)

I hope you are well. It is important that you know that you are awesome and graced. Keep your head high. I am currently at the Kenyan Coast🌞🌞 (I finally got there).

Today’s Commercial Break

You are not a Nice Guy
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I woke up today and chose violence. This post is dedicated to every guy who expects that he deserves a girl because he is basic and believes that he is not a ‘bad boy’. The ones who base their whole personality on the fact that they don’t take drugs and will not cheat on their girls. The ones that get mad when you reject them. The ones that think that they can just convince you to like them because they never seem to think that women have choices. If you relate to ‘Ross’ from Friends (I hate that Rachel wound up with him) or ‘Tim’ from Grand Army, this is for you. It is a rant. I am just tired of walking around people’s egos.

You are not a nice guy

Hello there, sir with a huge ‘Pick Me’ Attitude. You are the quiet guy who rarely clubs, rarely drinks and no one would you call a playboy. You are the church boy that my mum tells me to seek. Always posting bible verses and giving the most beautiful sermons. You are the smart nerd in my class who everyone bet is going to become a rich husband someday. You are the emotional friend that every girl feels like they can go to. You are the charismatic leader that everyone loves. Yes, you fool, I am talking to you. Have you considered that you are not a nice guy? If you think that you are a nice guy, think again sir!!! You are the wolf in sheep’s clothing and the worst part is that you don’t know it. We see through the fake wokeness as you speak about feminism, dear soft-core misogynist!!

Let’s start with your biggest flaw, ‘You have a big drawer of debts’. You write down everything that you do for me and wait for me reciprocate. With you, there is always another agenda. You believe that every good deed is going to bring me closer to you. You barely ever straight up say that you are interested in me. You just choose to show me and somehow hope that I will see. I am not your friend. I am not human. I am an investment for a love you hope to get. I might have even told you that I am not interested but you decide that you know better. My ‘No’ only serves as a motivation for you. You believe that you are what is good for me and nothing can change your mind.

You have a lot of baggage but you base your whole personality on your ‘nice guy’ persona. When you get rejected, you think ‘I am a nice guy so why didn’t she pick me?’ Your unlikable dull personality that barely glows in these streets has never reason. You just choose to believe that she prefers to whore rather than face it. You have nothing to offer as a partner. You think you are a good partner because you will not cheat but news flash, first, cheat with who (Do you have options, Dull Boy?). Second, relationships require more than just a promise that you will not cheat on me. Have you worked on your communication issues? Have you worked on your trauma? Don’t you think we haven’t already dated the ‘nice guy’ and had to face abuse in a society that thinks that you are the gift?

You have low self-esteem and always projecting. Yes, someone had to say it. Don’t think we don’t see how you are always trolling women on social media because you are sad that they love their bodies and you don’t. Don’t get me started on the tweets calling women who choose richer men ‘Prostitutes’. Is it our fault you are broke, Sir? Also, being broke is not a personality trait; you can stop with Twitter Thread. We get it, love, you are looking for someone to play ‘Acrimony by Tyler Perry’ with you. You with a struggling beard (we notice the countable hairs) and thriving potbelly but still wanna tell girls how to feel about their bodies. You with the dry face and lots of pimples that have me restraining myself from sharing my Pinterest board for skincare routines. Child, you can’t wash your face and moisturize your face right but have the audacity to decide who is pretty and who isn’t. You hate how I speak here right? Have you considered that that’s what every girl you try to put down feels? Yes, You who have never seen real boobs are always commenting that ‘sagging boobs’ on natural boobs; we get you are a virgin, and it’s none of our business.

How could I end this without talking about your entitlement? You think that since you are good (declared by you), you should get whatever you want. Often it is never the nasty playboys that our mothers warned to stay away from us that do us the dirty. It is always the nice boy that society praises. This nice boy has no concept of consent. He doesn’t believe in bodily autonomy; he just takes it because society says he deserves it. You think that you own us just because you invested in conversations. You think that we are supposed to drop everything for you. Why did you get mad that I did pick your calls, boo? Because you thought because you are a nice guy by your own standards, I owe you my time. It’s the audacity for me. You are the friends we trust, and you take advantage of that. We invite you to our houses and then your wolf comes running out.

Sweetie if you are reading this and thinking at least I am not like that, you are probably like that. If you know me personally and think that I am writing about you, let that shoe fit babe. I said what I said!! If you read this and realized that you are actually a crappy human, well, that’s cool boo. We all are working through something so there’s hope💖💖💖. I hope you found the courage to do better. I hope you realize that sometimes we don’t go for the ‘bad boy’ because we have daddy issues but because we see through your bullshit.

Disclaimer because I am about to trigger some of y’all, especially those who send me private messages or ‘advice’: This is my opinion that is my truth but doesn’t substitute your truth. The examples are inspired by my experiences, my friends, and Reddit posts. This is not to say that all men are not nice, but there are a lot of rotten apples. In fact, I know many men who are genuinely nice people, so if you think I am a misandrist, I am not. I just like to point out bullshit. I hope I won’t have to see people picking and choosing through to justify why they are nice (Which proves the whole point of the post). ‘Nice Guys’ struggle with accountability. Also, I don’t care that you are not like other men who are bad, and frankly, thinking you are God’s Gift is the problem. I am aware of the logical fallacies in this article, but you clearly fit a shoe if they bother you so much (see what I did there, another logical fallacy). Lastly, I love respect.


What has been your worst ‘Nice Guy’ experience? I have many️🤦🏿‍♀️🤦🏿‍♀️🤦🏿‍♀️🤦🏿‍♀️

Are you still sure that you are a nice guy?


Today’s Tip

You are not a Nice Guy
From Pinterest by Cheezburger

Today’s TIP takes to highlight an example of the ‘nice guy’. Find more example here.


With loooooove and light 🧡🌞🧡🌞🧡🌞


15 Comments Add yours

  1. Susan says:

    This was refreshing to Jackie 😊. I don’t like the entitlement especially when they don’t understand the concept of consent. You said it better. Thanks for sharing this post😊

    1. jackie says:

      I know right. The concept of consent is so easy but yet so many don’t get it. Thank you for reading and commenting

  2. I love your language and your clear flow of thought! you are a philosopher hehe

    1. jackie says:

      Philosopher 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Thank you for reading and commenting 💕💕💕

      1. You are welcome dear, pay no mind to the “nice guys” 😆😆😆

      2. kinge says:

        I also felt like the Introduction was poetic. So much energy in your words and truth in those lines…. 🌻

  3. Silver says:

    In my experience, men who self-identify as nice guys are most often not very nice guys, even in the slightest…

    1. jackie says:

      Very true. Thank you for reading and commenting.❤❤❤

  4. vaniheart says:

    ohhh man how i agree to this post….
    I have seen the most toxic people in the mask of “nice guy”….
    They can’t take a “no” ….
    The only difference between the creepers and the nice guy is one is straightforward, just blurt out what he needs not pretentious while the later keep on pretending and try to guilt trip you

    1. jackie says:

      I love this explanation. The creepers and the Nice guy. I am always shocked the audacity of the nice guys.

  5. Well, that was amusing to read, and from a young female point of view, despite the dramatic sound, you are possibly not far of the mark in your description of the opposite sex. However those on the opposite site might have a similar opinion about the sisterhood. In my time when it came to youth, there was no stereotypes that fitted, I think we tried out all kind of different characteristics to get the “girls”. But I must admit, observing now (among my grandchildren) what is going on between the genders appears far more complicated, we had it easier in our days. Your outspokenness is an inspiration

  6. judeitakali says:

    At first this felt like an attack on some of us really nice guys, but glad you broke it down to an individual.
    Yeah loads of those in both sexes, and many of the best people have skeletons in the closet. I think if we work on ourselves and grow our inner light, all we can do is have a positive change in such people, whilst immune to any permanent damage from them.

  7. beinglefenyo says:

    😂😂 wooah Jackie; woke up with violence indeed.

    I must say though I couldn’t help but wonder is the opposite is true, if believing you’re a good woman and thinking you deserve a good man doesn’t also place us in the category you so vividly described as fallacy.

    Food for thought indeed 🥲

    1. jackie says:

      Interesting point. I think the position of a woman in these situations is often different. Society expects us to wait to be chosen,women barely hit on men. But I think in our own way, we can position ourselves in a way that makes us ‘good’ women but with ulterior motives

  8. There are those moments when we have the need for a volcanic eruption and the scathing lava flow will turn into ashes sympathies and adversaries alike. As long we understand those venting’s not the determination of our character, they will contribute to our emotional balance.

I appreciate your opinion!!! Leave a comment!!